Posts Tagged ‘Popeye’

Lamar Kardashian A.K.A. Alice the Goon

Tuesday, March 6th, 2012

By LeRoy McConnell III

"Alice the Goon"

Yeah I said it, Lamar better known as Alice the Goon!  All he has done in a Dallas Maverick uniform is mope!  If you didn’t know any better, you would have thought he was traded to one of the bottom-feeders of the NBA such as the Bobcats, Wizards, Cavaliers, or Hornets!

The L.A. Lakers gave the Goon up for nothing, which now seems to be an ingenious move.  Maybe it was the Lakers’ plan to use Lamar as a sleeper cell the whole time.  Was it Lamar’s mission to sabotage the Mavericks?  He did ask for a trade.  I know Dallas isn’t L.A. but hey, the Mavericks are coming off their first ever NBA championship.  Although the Dallas Mavericks are not the same team they were last season, they are one of a handful of teams with an opportunity to compete for another championship this year.  For that to happen Dallas would need the services of last year’s Sixth-Man of the Year, Lamar Odom, not that wimpy scalawag Alice the Goon from the Popeye cartoons.

Mr. Kardashian, you have sickened my stomach ever since you’ve landed here in Dallas with all your  melodrama that is going on in your life.  I have to watch your damn show to get some insight on why you are playing so poorly.  Mark Cuban and Rick Carlisle have catered to you and your entourage ever since you have arrived in the Lone Star State.  Everyone gets a pass for not being in basketball condition this season because of the NBA LOCK OUT; but Mr. Kardashian you make a whopping nine million dollars a year.  I haven’t seen such filth on the court for that kinda money since we finally got rid of the second best center in the NBA two years ago in ERIC DAMNEER!

Dear Lamar,

I hope you enjoyed your vacation!  Just to let you know I am not interested in your personal issues that you have been dealing with the past ten days.  Earlier in the week the team threatened you, a thirteen year veteran, by placing you in the NBA D- League for a game or two.  I don’t know why the Mavericks went soft and cancelled your trip to the minor leagues but I hope it humbled you enough to get your act together.  There is still time to salvage this season.  It’s up to you.  Remember, you are auditioning for a contract at the end of this season because your team option is not guaranteed.  I can almost promise you will not be back in Dallas.  As a Dallas Maverick fan, all I want you to do is show better body language because it’s very poor.  Give better effort and act like you give a damn.  Believe it or not, you are in a good situation to help this team, so it is up to you.

Sincerely yours,

LeRoy McConnell III of A Fan’s Point of View, for War Room Sports